Is there such a thing as being friendsick? Just sent Grass off today and it suddenly hit home that all of my close friends have officially left. I can't just pick up the phone and call/text nette jing grass en-ting yux anymore, not without having to overcome a heart-wrenching timezone wait. I know I have these stupid hole-in-heart moments a lot but this one really takes the cake. Felt like crying the entire train ride back to sad little woodlands cos I feel like I don't have anyone anymore. And I know this is just gonna get worse in two years ish when luky/joel/lei leave too. It's not just the envy that they're moving on to something bigger and better, it's the realization that I'm the only one left back here missing their guts over enjoying what's supposed to be "the best experience of my life" (read: college). Everyone says it's hard for the person going overseas, for her to come back a changed person to everyone who's still expecting the old her, but I think people don't realize it's equally hard (harder, even) for those back home just constantly awaiting their return. 

I miss each and every one of you and even though I am so incredibly happy for you I wish you were all back here beside me.

I was lonely in my hall room


(i'd recommend earphones)

Are you kidding me people are actually miserable about studying overseas

?


God give me strength (and the patience to not thwack the living daylights out of such idiots)

Starting off this post with fried chicken because.. fried chicken

(how convenient that my photos are automatically in chronological order. I did toy with the idea of intentionally jumbling them up to achieve that "cool hipster-dont-give-no-shit" effect but ew hipsters.)


In response to the million polite enquiries on how my trip was, I summed it up in "Great! But I didn't bring enough money -sadpout-". How many times I've mentally strangled myself at realising that I accidentally left 2k baht READY CHANGED in my wallet back in Singapore, I don't know. All I know is that I could have bought so many more pairs of $3 denim shorts, and we 4 wouldn't have been reduced to a pathetic grovelling heap of paupers at the massage parlour on the last day hahaha.

That said, this has to be one of my favourite trips ever - from insane tuktuk rides, directions from Lei to "bring us to Lady Boom Boom", finally trying streetfood, COCONUT ICE CREAM, to almost missing our flight home (read: insane airport sprint complete with Yux's loud-ass pull-along luggage), this weirdly put-together group that raised hella eyebrows made this short getaway mucho lovely ^^

And ironically enough, it was the company of these 3 bkk virgins that made me feel like this was the first time I was actually properly experiencing Bangkok. I already miss dramatically throwing the curtains open at 5am (dont diss that shit till you've tried it) to drag them down to the morning Pratunam market.

Lying in bed feeling partially awful cos I bailed out on lunch with my fellow interns today cos the weather. I'm in my hideous Ares hoodie and it's so comfy right now I can't even remember the last time Singapore had weather as sweet as this. I'm trying to convince myself that in the bigger picture, I'm just resting because SYDNEY IS 12 HOURS' TIME BITCHEZ. After months of daydreaming the day has finally come ohgodmy. Feel hella bad for having to bail out on Social Night too (but in my defense I was crazily looking forward to that) but o well Sydney awaits.

Thanks to anyone and everyone who still reads my blog, including my readers from Russia SAYWHUT HAHAHA :'') See y'all in a week sweeties

So totally obsessed with Beauty And The Geek at the mo (Aussie version, season 3!!!!!) I've already dug out and stalked the private facebook profiles of my favourite couples~~

SO EXCITING imagine if i bump into any of them in Sydney! which is just 2 weeks away!! So excited that july is finally here- the thought of that travelling and shopping is driving me insane.

wkw camp to start in 2 DAYS gracious. I'm clearly not one for camps or getting active.... just an update for myself to look back on in the future - i nearly died during white-water rafting in Bali a few days back.... Fell into the current and got swept away hahaha........ I might do a proper picture update seeing as how i painstakingly took photos and edited them on my spanking new iphone (VSCOCAM HOLLAAA) but we'll see. I'm getting giggly tingles just thinking of all the free time i'm not gonna have this month w o o h o o

^^

Can I just say

I absolutely DETEST boys who are kiamsiap



D E T E ST 

Tantalizing pictures from last week's chaichowdown foodtrail with Shan for your viewing pleasure, and yes I know there are more photos of us than of the food, but I did say viewing pleasure after all (hurhur).

I dont know. Ever since I left Mediacorp I've been packed with meeting friends and eating and blowing what little cash I have away... and though of course I enjoy it, and I love seeing people, is it worrying that my life still feels incredibly empty after all of it?

Maybe it's still the uni thing bugging me. Okay who am I kidding it is the uni thing. Now that both the Singapore and UCAS deadlines have rolled around, people have pretty much confirmed where they're gonna be spending the next 4 years of their life and it really sucks knowing that I'll be spending (wasting????) mine in Singapore. I feel horrid cos I can't hide my moody sulking - I mean hello this is the biggest disappointment in my life as of yet so please empathise and don't call me a whiny bitch - and I think it's really hurting my parents. At the moment they're offering to pay for an education in USC if I transfer after my 2nd year at ntu. (Ya see how I can't even be bothered to capitalise ntu hahahaha whatever sue me) It's really a very possible option for me right now, I cannot even begin to explain how much my heart desires USC - THIS IS THE BIGGEST DAMN THING I HAVE EVER WANTED IN MY WHOLE LIFE. But then again there are all these "what if"s and the very scary possibility that I might end up loving ntu too much at the end of 2 years to want to leave. Sometimes I wish uni would just start already so I could have a clearer idea of what to do with the rest of my education.

That said, I think the root of my discontent lies in wanting to travel SO BADLY right now (which I guess could be traced back to the even deeper root of wanting to get out of stifling little Singapore). I think I'm being too narrow-minded but as of now I really just want to spend my life travelling around the world for work etc.

----Sidetrack: check out anouskaproettabrandon.com for the most amazing and gorgeous fashion blogger (she's Irish omg!!!!!) I've ever discovered. In all honesty she beats Rumi Neely hands down.----

With ref to the above, it's people like Anouska who really inspire me to want more with my life - travelling and taking beautiful photos for one (or the main) thing. July needs to hurry on and get its ass over (read: BKK and Sydney!) - I need to get out of this city pronto ):

Time to stop doing stupid things like just shopping and using the comp... I really wanna get back to playing the piano, making videos, writing to scrape together a portfolio... enriching myself la haha.