Sometimes I wonder if I conceded too quickly

CNY............... angbaos in rinngit, shopping, photos, outrageous/garish/brightlikefck clothes, shopping, food... that pretty much sums up my cny in Malaysia. Not really in the blogging mood these days, esp uploading photos (which, ironically from personal experience, i have deduced is the bait that snags and keeps readers), but if anything, 2 main thoughts have floated up to the top of my subconscious these past few days:

1) I WANT TO BAINIAN AT FRIENDS' HOUSES!!!!!!!!! ):

2) This might be my last cny with the family for the next 4 years

It's no secret how much I want to study in US. But oh god the admissions and the money.... I need a miracle. This leads to endless incessant worrying that leads to pseudo migraines that only lead back to (1) so I can find some relief in petty selfish whining. Also, I don't really wanna face up to the fact that (2) might be true enough to make me sorely homesick, esp in relation to my grandparents whom I've (finally) come to realise I treasure so, so much. 

A bit of visual vomit to get everyone through this dreary week

so yup yesterday was a mini GNO with Ariel ma love, the complete set of narcissistic photos to be posted on facebook later after dinner. Makeup and heels are always a fun combination and times like these i really love being a girl.

Today was spent positively bumming around the house online shopping and trailing my maid to learn a thing or two about cooking. I stirfried vegetables today ! Yay. And i'd like to think i had a hand in the fried rice for lunch hehehe.

When will my life take on meaning though... March is a tad far away for self-actualisation.

Sometimes i feel like the best way to express something I don't wanna explicitly say is through haikus.

Matters of the heart:

Annoyance and frustration

Time not on our side.

Opportunity

Constantly presented, but

Never grasped or got

Why is it always

From every other one but

The one who matters.

Granted these aren't the best literary works of art around, but shit like this got me through O'levels and post choir-stepdown withdrawal. 

yesterday was a lovely day spent at the Jurong Bird Park with two of my best friends in the whole wide worrrrld. It was hot and after a while we got pretty Hot and Bothered but the heat was nothing compared to the swelter of GardensbytheBay on gen's birthday last year... and I suppose it was a blessing in disguise since we didn't get rained on AT ALL the whole day~

The birdpark actually has quite a lot to offer ! Despite being known colloquially as the shitty substitute for the zoo hahaha (although there's nothing shitty about the admission ticket, it's pretty much the same). Quite amusing/annoying how nettey sussed out where we were going the minute we got in the queue for the bus @ the interchange, cos the whole stand was decorated with bird pictures HAHAHA. Also cute how she just happened to be in a top decked with birdssss.

So yes, nettey love, we have known each other for 7 years now, been married for 4, and survived being apart in different classes for 2. I love you more than a lot of things and people, and I really hope our friendship stands the test of time and future continental separation!!! I also hope you liked the special birthday song that parrot sang for you that took us all by surprise.

In other news, I am missing school and faccomm and my teachers and juniors and friends and basically HWA CHONG like crazyyyy. Went back the other day to get references and visit teachers etc - it was so lovely to catch up with them and to see my darling 12a10 again. I miss the class bench that took me in for 2 of the most stressful but rewarding years of my life. I miss every single lecture theatre and classroom I've ever had the honour to grace. I miss the fishtank that i will stubbornly call the fishtank for the rest of my existence. I miss being a junior, a senior, an Ares FC member, a ct rep, a senior ct rep, a rioHC chorister, a student, but most importantly a very very proud Hwachongian.

It's been a crazy past few weeks I've barely had any time for myself..! Going out with friends all day and night and just soaking in the knowledge and pure thrill of finally being FREE. Done with apps just a while back, which was a mad rush between getting back from New Zealand, planning and going to parties and catching up with babies from all over :>

New Zealand was just.. impossibly beautiful. Granted it was slightly boring at times, but hey, at least i was bored in like the most amazing place on earth (as of yet). Can't even do the slightest bit of justice to the views with any of my cameras - i just stood there (at most of the photo stops) trying desperately to drink in everything and commit it to memory for life. Impossible la but aiya my eyes were so changed that trip.

And it was adorable because we got to bond with our tour group too ! More so than any other tour group we've been in haha must thank brandon and his cuteness which just appealed to everyone. Even held a dinner party/potluck with them @ our crib it was pretty kooool 8)

Ah so much going on right now and I still need to find a job and apply for internships and applications... I guess this new freedom just opened new doors to a whole other kind of obligation. If this is what becoming an adult is like... it is not prettayye. But still, I'm just so, so glad and grateful that it's all over. I feel like I'm embarking on a whole new lease of life :)

okay i feel horrid for not updating but there is JUST NO TIME anymore!!! The days have been flying past faster than A's did ahahha. In a nutshell, after Music A's (ie. last paper) there was SATS, choir chalet, my Singing Diploma, harried days of prom prep, PROM, "post-prom", meeting up with dearly beloved(s) and now I'm flying off to New Zealand. More updates + photos after I return, but oh god that'll be Christmas time and who has time at Christmas......

I like how I'm so self-assuming that people still read this blog hahahaha