I am so tired of all this pleasing and acting I have to do why are boys so much more complicated than they're made out to be why can't things ever just remain platonic I am so sick of having everyone I love become like this I don't want to have to keep pushing people away; I just want to go back to St Nicks.

Been reading *******'s blog and formspring -i dont even know her but wtheck- and I realise what a fucking waste my life and time have been thus far. I need to start getting back on track and working my butt off if I really want to go to the US and escape all this madness and start "fresh" and just be happy.